Mead is a honey wine. It’s made from fermenting honey. Ain’t that something? Some enjoy this drink. So much so that they have free standing buildings dedicated to to celebrating its creation. They also drink it there and talk about how it tastes, its level of dryness, fruitiness, stink, and how the subtle pine notes dance upon the tongue and throat when slowly gathered in the mouth and down the esophagus. What a time to be alive.
MY birthday is very important. It’s probably the most important day of the year, right next to Christmas and Memorial Day. Simply put, Its my most favorite day EVER! I love love love it. I really do. Everyone who knows me understands this and respects the severity of the universal acknowledgment of extreme importance MY DAY deserves. And why wouldn’t they. They love me and hence they should also love MY DAY. And they do. And that makes me smile :) So gear up gals because this year is gonna be big! Real big!! Really really big!!! It better be…
The 90s…
Ten years of fun, family, french fries, and freedom…
A decade of TV shows, tap dancing, tag and tang…
521 weeks of Wendys, wishing wells, Walters and wonder…
120 months of memories, muppets, mittens and mint…
3652 days of doorbells, dips, dip shits and dung…
What a time to be alive…?
With so much information out there its hard to compute what’s worth investigating and what to toss in the old trash heap. A good rule of thumb is to do a broad general search online where you will no doubt be inundated with a cornucopia of factoids and expertise first hand accounts that will for sure tickle your underbelly. After a few hours of mindless scrolling, word skimming, and video vomit, your eventually find your fancy. From there the world is your oyster. Dive in, enjoy the jelly and see where your research takes you. Cheers!
Raising and nurturing a dog is said to be the most important job/life event one will ever embark upon in their short journey on this earth. From late night walks to the dog park to get one last sniff of a favorite bush, to early morning piles of feces on the threshold. There truly is no grater joy then dressing your pup in its favorite rain coat and boots and going frocking in the big city. Dog Talk with Sparky and Smokey celebrate this fact, and are here to provide you with years of expertise and know how to make sure your most important companion stays top dog.
Christmas time can bring about a jubilee of emotions. Where some enjoy the scents and sounds of cookies being baked in Nana’s kitchen, other may find the experience difficult and nauseating. While most love standing in long lines, tasting the many tints and textures offered by kraut carts, and sipping on $12 hot cocoas all compliments of the local Christkindlmarket; a small number, in fact a select few, may actually find the event idiotic, a rip off or dare I even say… stupid. And as most love the wonder and magic of Cotton Man’s Annual Sleigh Full of Cheer Christmas Special, others simply skip the episode - the choice is yours. God Bless!
This whole sports watching and analyzing thing can get quite exhausting. Especially when your in-depth investigation and expert commentary are shouted into a vacuum, a cosmic void, a barren tundra, a sunken ship taken over by the sea and its many mysteries, an elderly man’s sterile garage where a mint condition ‘96 Ford Taurus may or may not be parked, an empty gymnasium that smells of farts, a sleepy meadow where you and a lover once walked barefoot and naked in the dewy long grass in search of shade and patch of soft moss to lie down both your bodies and inhibitions. Oh to be young again.
Legend has it that the one known only as “The Keeper” shall inherit the cans. And as it has been foretold The Keeper shall: “Salvage, store, and keep safe” thy bounties. Today, tomorrow, and until thou is called upon to “return they from hence they came”. Until authorized: “thy Keeper shall continue to keep, even as thy spoils spoil, seals become unsealed and what was once liquid turns to hardened stone”. For it is written, it shall be true.
Happy Halloween Everyone! Seriously we hope you are smiling throughout the day. Really smiling and beaming with joy. Glowing really! We know that can be hard. So to help you celebrate this most celebrated and enjoyed of the holiday celebrations of fun-fun we a MITM pulled all our available funds to present to you a VERY SPECIAL episode chock full fo SPECIAL GUESTS. We hope you enjoy! Heck, special guests cost a special amount of money and since we did this we really have little to none left. So there that too…
Most doctors agree that your health is very important. Of course you can disagree, however, it’s hard to doubt the very notion when looking at the raw data and examining the fresh numbers that believe it or not you health IS a major factor when determining if your body is in good working order. It can be surprising and a tough pill to swallow and the choice is yours to use such information to benefit a better, cleaner, more active and healthy lifestyle, OR disregard such findings and continue to go on enjoying a lifestyle where all is on the table and your hunger is never deprived from sinking into whatever seems pleasing at that very moment. I say “Live your Bliss” and the rest will follow suit. Cheers.
Mike and Charley are back bringing you all kinds of shit for you to listen to. Put your ear near the speaker and let the crap envelop your concha while leaving a fresh coat of audio feces all over your large bowl shaped helix. Yep it’s a shit show for the ages, with plenty of burning, blasting, loud, and painful tones ready and waiting to be dumped all over your face and or neck. Beware, you’ve been warned.
‘Twas once a time when we had the time to sit. We’d sit on a wooden chair and gaze longingly out our kitchen window. We’d sit on an old bucket and sing in 3 part harmony with our fellow neighbors. Yes, we would sit and stare and stare sit, and sit in shit and shit and sit. It truly was a beautiful era and a time we so desperately lack today. So take a moment today and sit, listen and watch. Heck you just may learn something new, see an exotic bird, or at the very least have a chance to rest your aching back. XOXOXOXO
Feces. For decades scientists have been trying to duplicate the subtle textures, scents, and overall durability of one of the worlds’ most plentiful organic substances. However, such a feat has illuded some of this century’s most brilliant minds, as failure after failure had rendered the process near impossible. That all changed with the development of Synthetic Shit. The worlds first 100% Synthetic fecal matter. The future is now and its currently on sale!
Today on the Building Fence podcast “Where We Bridge the Gap”. Ben speaks with Rodney Curtin, Cambridge neuroscience expert and leading scholar on sustainable energy. Rodney is also a leading thinker and notable entity on all things AI, computer interfaces and Mediterranean cuisine. Today’s discussion includes: AI, the significance of Beluga Whales, LLCs, MBAs, the NBA, VBI and P.I.G, Existential Risk, Dangerous info Vs. Fun information, apples, pork futures, the number zero, the letter “O”, and other topics.
It can get a bit hot from time to time, especially during summer. Theres not much you can do about it, so don’t sweat it. My advice is to keep things super simple:
Swap your tall glass of corn syrup in the morning for a tin can of room temp tuna water - sip it slow.
Say good bye to your summer turtle neck and say hello to your new breathable burlap button up bomber - itchy in a good way.
When in doubt eat more pork - burn it.
A delicious ice cream cone not only tastes good but also feels good when rubbed on your under belly - hehe.
Stay moist - always.
Tackling the hard questions of the day while providing in debt quasi answers within a meandering complex labyrinth of words and guttural toots. Monsters in the Morning: After Dark is an open source, free wisdom, public service given to the world as a gift by Manic Mike and Touchdown Charley. Any and all donations are welcomed and celebrated.
To live in Pompeii was to live a life of happiness, joy, fruit, seawater, rocks, sand, sex, milk, mush… but also fear. For those in Pompeii knew there was an evil lurking in the sky, towering above them, waiting to spew its hot and juicy inner core all over the place. Twas only a matter of time till the grand “Party in Pompeii” would come to an end… for good.
One day it just hit me. I got up on a cool September morning, gazed upon the dewy grass, and knew right there and then that I belonged on a stage. Have I ever performed? No. Did I have any talent? No. Had I ever expressed in any way some sort of sign or signal, either verbal or nonverbal, to my loved ones, or even to myself, that I had an urge to entertain? No. Was I scared? Yes. Was I nude? Yes. Am I still scared? Yes. Am I still nude? Yes. But I still did it. I picked up the phone and called Giggle Playhouse right there and then. Within a week I was standing alone in a small unfurnished room with no air conditioning, a few less hundred dollars in my bank account, a bladder full of urine and a heart racing. I was home.
Just like the old saying goes: “March comes in like a lion, and out… like a… lion?” How true it is. How true it really is... But luckily as the cold wind turns to a quiet breeze, as the frost on our doorknob transforms from a chilly handshake to a dewing hello, we rejoice in the transformation of not only the season but of ourselves. Alas, rise up and rejuvenate in the warm glow of the sun - Ita Vero.
Traditions come and traditions go. But those that last the test of time are special, precious, sacred…important. We hold these traditions close, we hug them and love them and look forward to their perennial arrival with much anticipation and glee. So it’s only natural to celebrate these traditions throughly and intensely. It’s what makes them so much fun! So overdo it, indulge, and fill your body and soul with the overflowing joy and pride these traditions require. Then go and vomit it all out. Cheers.
